Nobody Cares About Hockey

At this point, just cancel hockey as a sport entirely. While Canada is still in a state of emergency over the currently delayed (and possibly cancelled) season, the majority of Americans (as in “USA”) couldn’t name five NHL teams. Seriously! I’ve watched hockey and here’s as many as I can name:

  • NY Rangers
  • NJ Devils
  • NY Islanders
  • LA Kings…

…that’s it. That’s all I can name, and probably more than most people.

While we’re making lists, here’s a comprehensive list of all the reasons to watch hockey:

  • Fights.

Hockey is a boring sport by American’s standards. Even soccer which is slowly gaining mainstream traction is constantly fast-paced which adds some excitement. Hockey has maybe 60-seconds of constant action if we’re lucky.

So now the players and the organization are fighting over players rights benefits safety money. In another dimension where the NHL is being played, the season is almost half over. Half of a season is gone and… do you hear that? No? That’s the sound of people caring.

So let’s just give up. Give up the stadiums that host games to all the Disney On Ice shows that come through town (heck, put all those traveling kids shows on ice) and just give hockey back to Canada. They care a lot more and they wouldn’t let this happen anyway.

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  1. Krispin Wah

    December 29, 2012 at 10:10 am

    You know nothing. I would argue on a by minute basis baseball is an even more boring sport and yet beloved.

  2. Scott Vollweiler

    December 29, 2012 at 10:13 am

    I disagree. ” Hockey has maybe 60-seconds of constant action if we’re lucky.” That’s quite wrong. Hockey is the only sport in America where there is pretty much all action. Baseball is uber popular yet has no action. The most action will be an inside the park homerun..maybe 20 seconds? Football…hike the ball, incomplete pass. Takes 6 seconds all the clock. If you are lucky enough to get a 99 yard kickoff return, then it takes a whole 15 seconds?

    Even if you don’t like the sport, it’s the second most popular sport internationally, behind Football aka soccer.

  3. David Stein

    December 29, 2012 at 12:13 pm

    Disagree, I have friends and family who love hockey including myself.

  4. writerofthisarticleisapussy

    January 7, 2013 at 10:59 pm

    your a bitch. hockey is the hardest sport to play. baseball=gay soccer=gay basketball=gay football= ok at times. bitch….

    • Amerika

      January 7, 2013 at 11:20 pm

      You must be Canadian.

  5. WTF!

    January 15, 2013 at 12:26 pm

    Boring? How about football? A third of the game is spent in huddles and waiting for the ball to be hiked. Then there is baseball and, oh my god, golf! Basketball is fast paced but it’s so predictable.

  6. hockey4life

    January 16, 2013 at 1:34 pm

    you people are all dumb in the head if you think that hockey is boring, and it will never leave the US!! Soccer is the worst sport and will never pass hockey!! As a hockey player I will not put up with my sport being called boring and slow. Why don’t you strap on the pads and see what it is like……

  7. Tony Jiang

    May 14, 2013 at 8:47 pm

    soccer constantly fast paced?? you have to be kidding me

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